Accept that Things Change

Look at change as a challenge rather than a threat.

Examine how and why you feel the way you do when things change. This is where journaling or other reflective exercises, including mindfulness and meditation, can all play a role.  Pausing to notice and understand when and why you think or feel the way you do is one of the first steps to shifting your mindset.

You can't change what happens, but you can change how you feel about it.

Life is complex, and it is often impossible to know from any given experience if ultimately the outcome will be positive or negative.  Losing a client or team member may feel horribly painful at the moment, but could lead to an even better opportunity in the future.  Part of resilience is recognizing that we ultimately cannot predict if an experience is good or bad at the moment.

See the Big Picture

View from the balcony. Take a step back, zoom out to see what is happening at a broader level, and reset your context.  As shared before, this “viewing things from the balcony” perspective can provide much-needed space to respond rather than react.

Look for things to learn. Difficult or emotional situations can teach you about yourself. Look to the future, and ask yourself how the stressful event might help you.

Look for humor in difficult situations.

Build Gratitude & Curiosity

Build a Gratitude practice. It may be helpful to combine taking a broader view of the situation with a gratitude practice.  Journaling, keeping a gratitude jar, or just saying out loud the things that you are grateful for can prime your brain to see more of the positives.

Curiosity and fear cannot coexist.  When you stay curious about your experience, about what might happen, you may reset your internal narrative.

Connect with Healthy People

Seek out interactions with people who make you feel better.

Establish a work culture with psychological safety where team members can be brave in sharing their challenges. Invite team members to show up as their whole selves, promoting honesty and recognizing that especially during the disruptions from COVID-19, that everyone is juggling a variety of responsibilities and stressors, and cannot be expected to just “check their baggage at the door.”

Develop a support network. You can read more about how to build a support network in the action plan healthy practice.

Believe in Yourself and the Things you Can Do

Solve problems. Look at all aspects of a problem, and brainstorm solutions. Ask friends for suggestions.

Do things to gain self-confidence and build self-esteem. For example, list the things you've achieved in your life or those that make you proud.

Replace your “to-do” list with a “done” list. On a daily basis, to-do lists can be demoralizing and draining, leaving you with a feeling of inadequacy and that you didn’t get enough done.  One technique that can help is having a “done” list, where you can visually see what you have finished each day and celebrate that.

Take Good Care of Yourself

Do things that you enjoy. See a movie. Have a good meal. Laugh with your friends.

Track your Energy

• One way to figure out what is important to you is Red/Green coding on your calendar. 

• For one or two weeks, put everything that you do for more than 15 minutes into your calendar. 

• After each activity, meeting, or type of work, color code the block red if you felt drained afterward and green if you felt energized. 

• Make a list of all the things that you find that energize you (both work-related and personal). 

• Keep that list visible by your desk so it is easier to do something you enjoy when you are feeling drained or stressed.

• You can also look at personal energy mapping from the Designing your Life book. 

Relax your mind and body through techniques such as deep breathing and guided imagery.

Talk about how you are feeling with a good friend or therapist.

Be thankful for the good you see around yourself.